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Five Ways to Tell You’re Eating at a Fake Mexican Restaurant

Obviously, Taco Bell doesn’t qualify as authentic Mexican food and the beef doesn’t even qualify as authentic MEAT.  But even if you go out to a nice Mexican restaurant, there’s a good chance that what you’re eating isn’t really Mexican food.

It’s Americanized Mexican food.  So if you want to find the real thing, here are five ways to tell when you’re eating at a fake Mexican restaurant.

#1.)  Your Food Is Covered In Cheese. Real Mexican restaurants use cheese as an ingredient, but not as a topping on EVERYTHING.

#2.)  They Serve Fajitas. Fajitas don’t exist in Mexico.  And they didn’t exist in the U.S. until the 1960s.  So if you’re eating fajitas, you’re eating Tex-Mex, not Mexican.

#3.)  They Serve Huge Margaritas. The margarita DID originate in Mexico, but an authentic one includes tequila, lime, and a splash of sweetener on the rocks. If a Mexican restaurant serves frozen, strawberry margaritas in glasses the size of fish bowls, they also probably serve trendy, Americanized Mexican food.

#4.)  The Restaurant’s Name Includes the Word “Cantina”. A cantina in Mexico is a men’s social club that also serves food and alcohol.  And unless the people around you are playing cards or dominoes, you’re not in a real cantina. In America, a cantina is just a bar that serves Mexican food and has specials on tequila shots.

#5.)  Your Waiter Is Dressed Like the Member of a Mariachi Band. Remember the outfits Steve Martin, Chevy Chase, and Martin Short wore in “The Three Amigos”?  If your waiter is dressed like THAT, you’re not eating authentic Mexican.

Speaking of “The Three Amigos”, here’s the most hilarious scene:

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