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Gallagher Is Retiring

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It’s the end of an era: Gallagher is giving up the comedy club scene after more than three decades of smashing things with a giant sledgehammer.

At 65, Gallagher suffered a heart attack before a gig earlier this month. A year ago, he suffered a heart attack DURING a gig.

Here’s that video:

We’re just finding out that he suffered a third heart attack on Sunday. This one was said to be pretty mild, but he’s back in the hospital.

While this isn’t a full-on retirement, for the most part, his live performing career is OVER. During a radio interview with Scott Spears on WDCM-FM in Marion, Ohio, Gallagher said, “I decided that this is enough.

“I have 32 years of live performing, and so I’m looking for just some little stuff, like retirement things, I’d like to show up at maybe company parties.”

It turns out the people are a big part of why Gallagher is through with the clubs. He said, “It’s babysitting people who can’t handle alcohol…It’s Lindsay Lohanville.

“People are just loud and stupid. I’m just too smart and educated…I guess it’s like being a teacher. I want my plaque and I’m out of that high school.”

Gallagher’s heart isn’t the only thing giving him trouble these days. He’s also having memory problems. In fact, when his daughter quizzed him recently about who the president was, he COULDN’T REMEMBER.

For some reason, he DID recall that Joe Biden is Vice President.

Even though doctors say his memory will return, he says, “I really don’t want to get on stage because sometimes I can’t remember what I said or what the word is and I don’t want to be pitiful.

“I can’t remember a lot of stuff. I was surprised I was in the hospital, and my son and my daughter were there. There’s a sadness when you can’t remember, I guess it’s like Alzheimer’s.”

But Gallagher’s not going to stop sharing his comedic brilliance with the world. He says, “I’m going to write and put it all on the Internet and people can just enjoy it that way.”

You can listen to the full interview here.  The Obama / Memory stuff is at the beginning of the interview.  The retirement talk begins at the 3:12 mark.  The part about the drunk people starts at 4:17.

Here it is, Carrot Top. This is your moment! Throughout your entire career, you’ve been Number Two in what is essentially a two-man field: Prop comedy. And now, IT ALL BELONGS TO YOU!

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